Coming Soon Trailers
Well, sad/not sad to say I was right last week: Gods of Egypt tanked harder than the all Asthmatic Olympic Relay Team. Speaking of horrible Olympic showings, both Race and Eddie the Eagle have likewise failed to inspire at the box office. This has been a rough patch for everyone not named Deadpool…can any of this week’s wide releases find a footing? On the VOD front, I knew there was something fishy about how few films were coming out just ahead of the Oscars…turns out they were saving it all up for this month. We’ve got six new entries to log this week! Let’s get cracking.
London Has Fallen
The sequel to Olympus has Fallen (a movie I did not realize did well enough to warrant a sequel…I guess 90 mill on a 70 mill budget is enough to get this creaking ship into the water for one more go) this time the unluckiest US President ever has been taken hostage in London, and his faithful secret service manslaughter-servant Gerard Butler (looking to go 0-2 this month?) has to rescue him…again.
When to See It: Pick it up as part of a budget “Gerard Butler 3-Pack” at your local convenience store for 9.99 in April. Man, how the marginally successful have fallen.
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
Tina Fey is a reporter covering the US operations in Afghanistan who has to survive bombings, briefings, and a budding relationship with a Scottish correspondent.
When to See It: Rent it. Fey is funny, but I never pay full theater price for a comedy. Especially one with a former SNL alum.
In a city run by animals of all stripes, an idealistic young rabbit police-woman must trick a luckless fox con-artist into helping her solve a city-wide spree of missing persons.
When to See It: Matinee with the kids, otherwise wait for rental. It’s Disney, so its sure to be polished, but doesn’t seem to have a whole lot new going on. Animals acting like people is pretty much Disney’s hole-card whenever they can’t think of some fairy tale to exploit.
Video on Demand
A low level criminal who supplies heist info to high level criminals is set up by dirty police agents and must make a run for it with his estranged daughter.
See It: Maybe. Love heist movies. Vince Vaughn, not so much…though there was a time when his stock was much higher. Could this be a bit of a comeback? Rest of the cast seems solid. This is a definite maybe.
A Scandinavian geologist monitoring an active geological zone is unprepared when an 85 kilometer wave threatens to sweep away everyone he knows and loves…ON HIS LAST DAY AT THE JOB. (Seriously, the last day on the job is movie code for “some serious shit is about to go down.”)
See It: Yes…when it makes its way to the cheapo section or Netflix. The CGI is just decent enough to cover up for some slightly awful dubbing, and seeing how a non-Hollywood team handles a disaster film should be fun.
Two unlucky hitch-hikers from different countries end up catching a ride with an older pair who seem to know a bit too much about how unsafe the local roads are for transients.
See It: Maybe. There doesn’t seem to be much left to the imagination after seeing the trailer. That being said, the action does look pretty good. If you like the genre, looks to be a better way to spend an evening than thumbing a ride.
When the regular sitter drops out, three kids are left with Anna, a young woman with a decidedly macabre outlook on life and child rearing.
See It: Yes. Looks like a solid horror film, although I can not for the life of me figure out the title. Nobody in this trailer was named Emelie. Go figure.
Ava is a young single woman with a problem: since she was possessed by an evil spirit, and later cured, she can see and interact with the spirit world…and many of those spirits think she would make a wonderful new room mate.
See It: Maybe. Looks stylish and subversive, but a tad corny on the dialogue front. As long as most of the groan worthy puns were just in the trailer, it could be a fun film.
A group of couples in Toronto all start to reevaluate their relationships when one of the more solid couples in the clique has a blow-out break up.
See It: No. If you’re most pressing concern in life is who you’re fucking and if you should be trading up to fucking somebody else, I haven’t got time in the day to deal with your prep-school bull shit.