Movie Review: Avengers – Endgame

Avengers: Endgame

Movie Review: Avengers – Endgame

After 22 movies, we’ve finally reached the endgame. And to varying degrees, Avengers: Endgame is a satisfying conclusion.

Well, here we are. Reviewing Avengers: Endgame, a movie that made 1.3 billion dollars in its opening weekend. If you are one of the few that resisted FOMO (2019’s most tedious trend-word), or if you’re waiting for the lines to die down this review is for you. Everyone else, well, you probably already saw the damn thing.

Seeing as this movie already has a million reviews, and reviewing it in any substantive way would require at least mild spoilers, I’ve decided to answer one question about Avengers: Endgame: How satisfied will you be walking out of a movie that caps off 11 years of storytelling? I’ll break it down in tiers, based on how invested you are in the franchise.

Avengers: Endgame (2019)

Avengers: Endgame
Closing time….

After Thanos’ victory, the remaining Avengers struggle to deal with their first devastating defeat. Some look for revenge. Others try and pick up the pieces and move on. When a supposedly vanished Avenger returns, the team has a new glimmer of hope.

Tier 1: Ride or Die MCU Stans

Agent Coulson
You’re this guy. But alive. Canonically at least.

Do you really need to hear anything from me? You’ve probably already seen the movie, at least once. So to you, loyal fan-person I’ll make this quick.

  • Your satisfaction level will correspond almost entirely with who you wanted to see live and die. There’s no real plot holes, the movie moves at a fair clip, and everyone (and I mean everyone) gets a brief moment to shine.

Tier 2: Casual Marvel Movie-goer

You’ve probably seen all the tent-pole movies, like Iron Man 1, Avengers, and Black Panther. Sure, you skipped Iron Man 3 and Thor: The Dark World, and you probably have no clue who Ant Man is; but you know the broad brush strokes. You’re interest in the MCU is probably¬† due to either fandom for one particular actor/actress or a love of popcorn fare spectacle. This one is for you.

  • If your favorite character isn’t Tony Stark or Steve Rogers, you’ll be satisfied but not over the moon. Everyone gets a moment, but even at 3 hours they couldn’t give everyone a fully fleshed out arc. Almost all the core Phase 1 Avengers get decent arcs in Endgame, but Spider-fans and WandaVision shippers are going to feel only slightly tickled. This film is for the OG’s.
  • If you love action, you’ll be sated but not entirely euphoric. The action in this film is well paced and varied, but it’s not anything you haven’t seen before. I watched it in 3D and never once was I blown away. There’s smaller, more personal fights, and they are well choreographed. The big battles are BIG, but nothing you hadn’t seen in Avengers 1 or Infinity War. It’s action movie home cooking: you know the recipe in and out, but it’s nice to have once in awhile to remind yourself how it tastes.
  • If you were scared about the 3 hour run time, you should be fine. The pacing is pretty good, with no real drags. Lulls in the action usually come because the movie is trying to hit you in the feels, so there’s a nice rhythm of touching to punching. If the story is interesting to you (you got through Infinity War without your eyes rolling back into your head), “the first time effect” should keep you going. My first viewing honestly felt like a 2 hour experience. I have no clue what a 2nd or 3rd showing would be like. But if you want a 2nd or 3rd helping, you should probably move yourself up to Tier 1.


Tier 3: I Just Want Things to Explode Real Good

Old Spice
To be fair, I’d pony up if they made this a movie too.

If you happily plunk your money down for anything Michael Bay makes, congratulations, this tier is for you. You go to the movies for action, story be damned. Honestly, just read the second bullet point in Tier 2. I just wanted to call you out. I see you, Eye-Candy Man.

Tier 4: “The Experience” Experiencer

You like new things. I bet you saw Avatar just because of the tech, and found Alita’s eyes novel. You’re the kind of person who doesn’t mind action films, as long as something in it is new or innovative. You enjoyed all three Matrix movies and John Wick, yet you aren’t a Keanu fan-boy named Neil. How will Endgame treat you?

  • You are probably the only one who will walk out disappointed. Marvel has had some innovative films, but this ain’t one of them. Guardians of the Galaxy had comedy. Dr. Strange had trippy visuals and magic. Black Panther had Afro-Futurism. Avengers: Endgame is home-cooking. It does what it does well, but it’s very much in line with previous Avenger movies, plot-wise and aesthetically. The only novel thing they do is land this plane after 11 years in the air surprisingly well. That might not be enough for you.

    Avengers Endgame
    This might be you, though your mileage may vary. By light-years.

Tier 5: I’ll Wait For Home Release

What are you doing on the internet right now, you fool? Your life is going to be hell for the next 6 months. I can’t believe you’ve got this far without knowing what “the snap” refers to, and I doubt you’ll dodge all the memes and “why did they kill X character” blog posts coming your way after Endgame. My only advice: go on vacation. To like the Amazon. If you have ever wanted to see the Antarctic, now’s your chance, cheapskate.

Empire Strikes Back
“Imperial Spoiler-Droid. It’s a safe bet Disney knows we’re here.”

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